Wow, what an amazing game. I’m writing this as I go through it and it has to be the most comprehensive game I’ve seen on RPGPLayground to date. It’s absolutely amazing! No kidding, I love it!
Okay, since I just started your game, I’ll go over what I like and don’t like: Right now, I think it was fantastic that you had “signs” written on the carton and tree, which most people don’t do (I don’t, because a lot of people don’t look there ;)).
I also think they way you did the speech was amazing, because I haven’t seen anyone do it like you [even if it simple], with quotes for the actual words, and none for thoughts or actions. I may seem silly for saying that is awesome, but I haven’t seen a game that did that. Very well done.
I also think you created a very complete game, just by starting it out. If this website had more options to use (i.e., choices that are made in the speech bubbles), that would make your game better.
However, as of right now, I don’t like the number of names being thrown at me as of right now. It’s a lot to think about, especially because a random “Koen” was thrown in there and I got confused. Consider making the characters talk like: ‘Spec: “I think this was a bad idea,” he mumbles.’ However, I think I’ll learn all the names soon enough!
I also don’t like how Troy (?) and Syracruse (Excuse my spelling), show up twice in the same scene. Not cool, consider making two scenes to convey your point (too late now, but still).
Also, going into the tent is confusing, I don’t know where the heck I’m going. I kind of was hoping that it was all complete, but I walked into “the light” and into an empty room with no escape. So, I’m going through the completed scenes now to give you feedback.
I like it, I can see what you did here. However, I’m a little confused as to what happened. She was supposed to kill me? Or just warn me? And the doors in the middle of nowhere were weird, no offense.
However, good job with the dialogue. You did a very good job with it again.
Just a bunch of doors right now, I know you’re going to work on it though. Nice job decorating, anyway!
Man, I hated finding everything but the Red Flag. Bummer. And I don’t know what I really was supposed to do with it anyway, so… I’ll just see what happens…
Interesting (I finally figured out how to use the Red Flag). I like the game, and I can’t wait for you to finish it!
A few last words:
Sometimes, entering a door will present us in the middle of nowhere, by no fault of your own. However, I would suggest using a “two-way door system”, where the doors are connected, and you will always leave and enter a place by a door.
Finally, good job. Really. I can’t wait for you to finish!